Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize