Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Randomize
