Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
