I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
