I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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