am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
