I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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