SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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