adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
