I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
