I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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