But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
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