im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize