laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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