I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize