It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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