I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize