Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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