Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
He better not be in your backpack
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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