I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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