Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize