She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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