I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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