You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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