Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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