I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
