she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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