I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I skipped work to stalk him.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
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