Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
