i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
