I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
