The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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