it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize