It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
