my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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