i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
