I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
