can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
