He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
