I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
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