3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
