Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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