I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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