Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
