Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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