Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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