you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
