I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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