I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Randomize
