member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
